the twitter thread the artist created after this was one of the best situations i have ever seen in my whole life:
Somebody give this ignoramus a piece of actual shark skin and tell him to rub his face with it, let him find out just how “smooth” sharks really are.
Somebody did. I use it as a pillowcase because it’s so smooth.
But buddy.
Shark skin feels exactly like sandpaper. It is made up of tiny teeth-like structures called placoid scales, also known as dermal denticles. These scales point towards the tail and help to reduce friction from surrounding water when the shark swims. … In the opposite direction, it feels very rough like sandpaper.
Some Majora’s Mask comics that I started forever ago and never finished. I really like them though so I will finish them at some point. I still need to sketch the last one and then figure out how I want to color them.
lmao Adam Conover found out marvel was gonna be filming near by so he took a bunch of folks down and picketed in front of the location so the teamsters wouldn’t be able to get in and stopped the filming
you want to help stop tumblr from murdering itself? here’s how!
click this link and go to the support page, then click “contact support”
click on the category list and click on feedback
now you need to tell staff WHY putting in an algorithm will cause the site to fucking die, and be sure to be detailed and not a dick in it. theyre not gonna listen to feedback calling them assholes
i encourage you to reblog this so we can get as many people leaving feedback as humanly possible. we need to let staff know this is an utterly terrible idea
by the way, tumblr has turned off asks on all of their staff blogs, so this is the only way to tell tumblr how you feel
I’ve come to make an announcement: Shadow the Hedgehog’s a bitch-ass motherfucker, he pissed on my fucking wife! That’s right, he took his hedgehog-fuckin’ quilly dick out and he pissed on my fucking wife, and he said his dick was “this big,” and I said “that’s disgusting,” so I’m making a callout post on my Twitter.com: Shadow the Hedgehog, you’ve got a small dick, It’s the size of this walnut except WAY smaller. And guess what? Here’s what my dong looks like! That’s right, baby, tall points, no quills, no pillows — look at that, it looks like two balls and a bong! He fucked my wife, so guess what, I’m gonna fuck the Earth! That’s right, this is what you get: my SUPER LASER PISS!! Except I’m not gonna piss on the Earth, I’m gonna go higher!! I’m pissing ON THE MOON! How do you like that, Obama?! I PISSED ON THE MOON, YOU IDIOT!! You have twenty-three hours before the piss drrrrroplllllllets hit the fucking Earth! Now get outta my fucking sight, before I piss on you too!
Happy one year anniversary to the video that gave us this improvised gem.
“Hi y'all, it’s Chronomaster42, the only Youtuber with the ability to travel through, and control, time and space, here with another taste test. I’m here in 1976, and I’m gonna get some fries from Mickey D’s before they changed the recipe, and then I’m gonna take ‘em back to 2022, and get fries from the same McDonald’s, so I can compare. Now, I’ve got my Nixon, uh, Ford? Carter? Era fries right here, so now I’m gonna”
*everything appears stretched and distant, and then the camera flies through space, through the sun, over millions of different Earths, past the faces of individual people in a thousand different timelines, splintered day by day, the long-dead alive once more, their varied futures lying before them. They appear to be screaming*
“annnnnd here we are, gettin’ the new fries, today. I have to say, I like the old fries a bit better, bit more crisp, but Mickey D’s fries are still Mickey D’s fries, y'know? Anyway, I know some of you guys were freaked out at all the screaming time faces last video, but like, I’m used to 'em, and they aren’t even audible to me? But y'know what is audible? That’s right - Audible, use code -”
“Hi y'all, it’s Chronomaster42, the only Youtuber with the ability to travel through, and control, time and space, here to respond to some allegations.”
“Lots of you are saying, Chronomaster42, why don’t you stop World War II? And I keep saying that I can’t change history. History’s got, like, antibodies, and these haters eject me back to my time if I do anything that’ll change anything. Like the space time con…tainium doesn’t want me traveling around time.”
“And before you start bringing up that guy who erased…France? The fuck is France? From ever existing, that wasn’t me, you guys. Get your facts straight. That was @true_chronomaster, the only TikToker with the ability to travel through, and control, time and space. i have nothing to do with the Evil Leaper Challenge. I don’t have a shadow self. But y'know what I do have? Some words from our sponsor, Raid: Shadow Legends -”
“Hi y'all, it’s Chronomaster42, the only Youtuber with the ability to travel through, and control, time and space, and today I’m gonna be doing the challenge Gamer_Springtrap2011 gave me, where I’m travelin’ back in time to finally figure out which religion is true, and then I’m gonna make a tier list so we can put all this drama about which religion’s the right one behind us and just settle on one of 'em that’s the best. Like, finally, you know?”
“But before we go back in time to see if Adam and Eve was real, we’ve gotta check in with our sponsor, Adam and Eve, discreet packaging and shipping -”
“Hi y'all, it’s Chronomaster42, the only Youtuber with the ability to travel through, and control, time and space, still sorry to every world religion, though like, you should really be mad at Gamer_Springtrap2011 for trolling me so hard. I got trolled guys. I’m sorry for my video 'CHALLENGE: I get this guy sitting under a tree in India to break his concentration’. I’m sorry for my video 'WHOA: I told a Roman cop where a guy was and got THIRTY SILVER COINS?!?!?’ and shout out to Judas for catching my strays. Like, guys, I’m sorry. You should be mad at Gamer_Springtrap2011 though.”
“Anyways, I’ve got this cool new money-making opportunity in the past. So like, what if we take things from the past, and sell them now? I found this guy with all this metal in his house, and it turns out nowadays they’ll pay a lot for it 'cause normally you can only get copper from people stealing wire to pay for meth, but this is really good, honest copper. But like, I’ve gotta preserve history and shit, so I’ve been taking his copper and replacin’ it with painted rocks. I think people are realizing 'cause every time I go to his house the copper guy’s real mad and carrying stone tablets, it’s funny. That Earnie Sir guy may be selling bad metal, but if you want real metal to hang on your walls, check out our sponsor Displate -”
“Hi y'all, it’s TimeController73, the one EbaumsTuber with the ability to travel through, and control, time and space, and I uh, think I might have messed up the continuum a bit. I’m gonna take some time to fix it, but you know who will have the movie you want to stream right now? Today’s sponsor, Blockbuster+…”
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